Guest Addressing Etiquette
Now that you’ve decided on wording for your wedding invitations, it’s time to move forward with guest addressing. So, what’s the correct etiquette to use when addressing wedding invitations?
For some weddings, there may be an inner envelope to accompany the more formal outer envelope. Titles on the inner envelope can be less formal and more personal depending on your relationship with the guest. The outer envelope is where things can get tricky when it comes to titles, full names and correct spelling.
Here are several variations of how to address wedding invitations to your guests.
To married couples…
For couples with the same last names, use titles “Mr.” and “Mrs.” followed by the husband’s first and last name.
Outer envelope: “Mr. and Mrs. Mohan Boolchandani” or “Mr. Mohan Boolchandani and Mrs. Smita Boolchandani”
Inner envelope: “Mr. and Mrs. Boolchandani” or “Mohan and Smita”
For couples with different last names, make sure to write the wife’s name first followed by the husband’s name. If the names are too long to fit on one line, they can be placed on two.
Outer envelope: “Mrs. Krishna Jain and Mr. Keith Desa”
Inner envelope: “Mrs. Jain and Mr. Desa” or “Krishna and Keith”
To an unmarried couple…
It’s becoming more common for couples to cohabitate even if they are not married and sharing the same last name. In this case, list the guest you are closest to first followed by their partner’s name.
Outer envelope: “Ms. Alisha Singhal and Mr. Sidharth Rai” or “Mr. Sidharth Rai and Ms. Alisha Singhal”
Inner envelope: “Ms. Singhal and Mr. Rai," “Mr. Rai and Ms. Singhal” “Sidharth and Alisha,” or “Alisha and Sidharth”
To a single guest…
List single guests as you would any others with “Mr.” and/or “Ms.”
Outer envelope: “Ms. Srushti Soni” or “Mr. Jackson Phillips”
Inner envelope: “Ms. Srushti” or “Srushti” and “Mr. Phillips” or “Jackson”
To a married couple, one or both of whom are doctors…
List the guest who is a doctor first with titles spelled out on the outer envelope. If both names don’t fit on one line, you can place them on separate lines.
Outer envelope: “Doctor Lara Kulkarni and Mr. Nikhil Kulkarni”
Inner envelope: “Dr. Kulkarni and Mr. Kulkarni” or “Lara and Nikhil”
In the case of a married couple whom are both doctors with the same last name, it’s appropriate to address the couple as “The Doctors.”
Outer envelope: “The Doctors Bhosale” or “Drs. Disha and Deepak Bhosale”
Inner envelope: “The Doctors Bhosale” or “Disha and Deepak”
To a guest or couple with other distinguished titles…
The same rules apply to guests with titles such as judge, reverend or military personnel. In this case, you will list the guest with the title first followed by their partner’s name.
Outer envelope: “The Honorable Eshaan Mehta and Mrs. Richa Mehta”
Inner envelope: “Judge Mehta and Mrs. Mehta”
To a widow…
This can be addressed two ways: She can be addressed by her married name or by her husband’s name. In this case, it’s best to ask someone who is close to the guest, such as a family member of the widow.
Outer envelope: “Mrs. Grace Stewart” or “Mrs. Gavin Stewart”
Inner envelope: “Mrs. Stewart” or “Grace”
To a divorced female…
You can address the guest as Mrs. or Ms. along with her ex-husband’s last name if she still uses it or you can also use her maiden name.
Outer envelope: “Mrs. Jinal Joshi”
Inner envelope: “Ms. Joshi” or “Jinal”
To a family including children…
The family name or parents’ names should be listed alone while children can be included on the inside. When listing a female under the age of 18, address her as “Miss”
Outer envelope: “The Pahwa Family” or “Mr. and Mrs. Prabhjot Pahwa” (children would be listed on the inner envelopes.)
Inner envelope: “Ranveer, Prabhjot, Zara, Mohit and Miss Sia”
What if I am not doing inner envelopes?
No problem! These days, a lot of people don't do inner envelopes and that is totally fine. It will save you money on invitations, and they may not always be necessary. If you want to be clear that children are not invited, for example, inner/outer envelopes are a great tool. For my wedding, we had about 15 addresses with both inner and outer envelopes, the rest we just sent with one! That way the guests with children knew for sure they were or were not invited, and it saved us some money on envelopes by not doing them all.
For most envelopes, the above suggestions apply! Here is some advise for addressing children when just using one envelope...
The most formal way to address an envelope without the inner envelope would be to list the parents' names on the first line, and list each child's name on the next line:
"Mr. & Mrs. Jeremy Smith
Miss Laney and Miss Annie"
For more informal events, you can list them together:
"Mr. & Mrs. Jeremy Smith and Family" or as stated above, "The Smith Family"
